Maybe I am an angry feminist; at least I am a feminist and I am angry

I am glad to remember a childhood full of playgrounds, dirt, dares and Pippi Longstocking. My parents never made me wear pink, neither did they force me into turning into a princess on carnival (I would have looked ridiculous with my bruised knees anyways). And as much as I am happy about my parents crafting me ‘the little water-sprite’ costumes, I also grew up to neighbors and acquaintances telling me that ‘a good boy is lost in me’, that ‘girls do not solve problems with their fists’ and that my short hair looked ‘ugly for a girl’. And while one could expect things changed with puberty, I still get asked at least once a month why I don’t wear make-up and whether my boyfriend minds me not dressing up for him.

This article is not meant to become a feminist pamphlet, raising the gender inequality in our society. It originates more in an observation of Westerners abroad, who feel way too superior and advanced over the local culture, acting as if Europe was perfect and advanced while all other places stay behind (very abridgedly said). Because it is not. And while people tell me that ‘feminism sucks’ and that ‘meninism’ should be the new thing, these sentences, and especially the mindset behind them, upset me a lot.

I could give dozen examples of being called either a virgin or a slut, both in order to insult me (mostly by complete strangers); of having my head forcefully touching a man’s crotch when passing the bench he is dancing on; of my 60-something-year-old driving instructor telling me to ‘continue with him’ when my hand is free; of having been told that I will never find a boyfriend if I do not change my attitude and start appreciating ‘compliments’ (in that case whistling behind me); and being called a despot when asking the boyfriend (who ironically still stayed together with me despite my lack of change in attitude…) to help me with the laundry.

This list is long; I have to hold back not to make it longer. Because I could. And these are all only examples I encountered in Western Europe. (By the way nothing like this happened to me here in Hong Kong). So please people, I know I am extremely lucky and privileged to live in the Western world. But stop being so ridiculously arrogant and patronizing about this fact and start working on our own environment. There is more than enough to do.

_Advertentie.